Saturday, September 29, 2012

Meanwhile the Goldenrod

Recently I have begun to appreciate more deeply and more consciously how perfect it is that change is part of our design to grow as evolving consciousness. I know of several people who have died in the past few weeks, people who were close to friends of mine. As each person has shared their perception and feelings about the sudden changes in and of life, I have thought more about what I have learned in my life, so far, about change, about life and death, about the joy potential of living each moment.  As my parents lived their deaths, they helped me to learn about my own beliefs about life and about death (change), and about what commitment to life means. Each thought, word, and action is a symphony within itself that reverberates as our life imprint. (Sound empty, like so many “campaign” words?) Keep thinking. Do you really believe that?

Each dose of a drug my parents’ doctors prescribed, for example, came with its own provenance – it s own realm of creation, intention, purpose, and potential effects. As I researched and read labels to better understand the world of pharmacology, I became more aware of my own beliefs about “the unknown” and my own strength of mind to know that knowledge gained is power to be used through the freedom we each have to choose and to improve the quality of our life through our choices. I understand now, that this is the same pattern of change I began to learn, accept, and live in relationship to food, water, and all manner of ingesting and inhaling. Think, choose, do – as we gain knowledge, our behavior will change, IF we are growing. We will feel differently, happier, IF we are growing. We will begin to know our own strength, and the equal strength of others as human beings, to choose and to Do.

What will happen if “we” don’t take this, don’t do this, as recommended?
What could happen if we do?
How do I feel about these thoughts and potentials of reality?
“We have to follow the rules.” Who made the rules and why?
What are we being loyal to and why?
What motivates me to change?
Am I afraid or excited about change?
Do I know and trust my Soul and Spirit mind beyond my physical mind? 
How do I feel?

Since I’m fifty years old now (! – actually, we triplets have always multiplied our age by 3, so that makes me 150) and both of our parents have died, I have a different reference point than even a few years ago. The motivation to learn more, to share more, to trust more in the gift of the Spirit mind that we are given to help guide us as we are open to learning and growing (changing), is a deep, deep river of energy that is as calming as the ocean can be to the mind that loves to hear the wind, to see the sparkles of light dancing off of the waves, taste the salt of endless travel in experienced water that remembers power and the purity of light and movement.  Little glimmers of fear that I feel in moments of “what if”, I recognize now as eternal seeds of promise given to me as invitations to “let go” and trust, know love, enjoy the spontaneous energy of life itself, always creating. 

I just had notice from a County official about overdue property taxes. At first I was confused.  What? With that, a slight glimmer of fear of, oh no, I don’t have that! Then, the calming of – simply take the steps of thinking, communicating, resolving. The choosing and doing that life is made of.  As we learn and grow as a mind, with love as our guide, we begin to civilize ourselves. Most parents know this well! The step-by-step creating of day-by-day life is what makes a life, builds a legacy of energy that lives on. As I watch the news (which I do a lot), I am so conscious of the different energies we present as the world and which we choose to focus on. This morning, as part of the CNN Heroes updates, I heard a story about an Afghan woman who moved back to Afghanistan after living in the US for 38 years. She moved because, as she said, she wanted to show the world that all Muslims are not terrorists. She opened a school for Afghan girls.  $300 educates one Afghan girl for one year. That puts dollars into another perspective.

This is an example to me of one woman, and all of those she has magnetized (inspired) to support her cause of positive change for humankind, who has chosen to commit her efforts to change and growth by DOING. “Change is growth; therefore, if we are open to change we will always grow. Once we accept change, the only requirement for growth is the commitment that we must make to the doing.”  (Bridges of Consciousness, ix-x)  As I’m reading Kathy Oddenino’s second book, Bridges of Consciousness, I’m thinking of all of these things. I’m reading another phrase I read once – “the illusion of death does not change what is.” I am so grateful to have chosen to expose myself to the knowledge of who we are as consciousness – to challenge my mind to think beyond where I have thought before.

As we talked about death and change, a friend asked me how I know that death is not terrible (as I haven’t experienced it). My answer was that I have learned, so far, and through studying Spiritual Philosophy, that I create my own reality and through my physical experience I live each pattern of change and growth as a spiritual being – so what happens (as I create and experience life, change) as I live and change, day by day, through all interaction and relationships, teaches me that all change happens in the same ways. We get better at it at the most profound levels, if we can recognize the value of change for us. Loss is real as change happens, but what we gain through understanding of energy that we share and that we are encompasses loss the way a wonderful warm hug from a mother or friend or lover does in the moment we feel the love shared.
Meanwhile, the goldenrod we planted last week is urging its buds into bloom, and that makes me smile. Rain drips a bit after the hard rain (which was welcome), and the trees stand tall still as the seasons change, moment by moment. 

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