Wednesday, July 29, 2009

More Cloud Studies

I recently discovered there exists such a group called the Cloud Appreciation Society! If you're a reader and a cloud lover, I suggest these two books, as others have: The Theory of Clouds (a novel) and The Cloud-Spotter's Guide. Here are two of my views from my Pittsboro-GPS point in the world.

Friday, July 17, 2009


I've been noticing books throughout history that relate to our human need to understand ourselves, the reality of what we think of as "time travel." Audrey Niffenegger's novel, The Time Traveler's Wife (2003)was one of the best novels I've enjoyed in years (her next is to be published this Fall, and a movie made of Time Traveler).

Energy is Real......!

Friday, July 10, 2009

Our World Shrinks and Grows

Last night three of us sat at a table talking about life. One asked, do you miss your friend who died? Our friend nodded, said Yes, I do. Fred was her neighbor, a man living alone in the trailer he and wife shared after their house burned. His wife had died a few years before. Fred never learned to read or write, and he’d had cancer that had eaten away flesh in his face, later in his mouth. He was a thinker, and a caring man. My friend spoke of how he would come over, check on things when she was gone, at work or away. He would show up to mow the grass, which she paid him for, or just to talk, to be there as she burned brush cleared from the land. He would ask her advice about medical questions, and had no fear of follow up to know more, with his doctor. Once she was home and her car was in the shop. She saw Fred appear in the front yard and walk to the garden. He had a bag and began to pick tomatoes. She watched for a minute, then approached. What are you doing? she asked. Roger wanted some tomatoes, he said, matter-of-factly. I don’t care who wants them, she said. Don’t steal my tomatoes! He heard her, and another day, another way, he related that memory and said, I’ll never steal from anyone again. I learned my lesson!

As we talked, I thought of what it must mean not to read or write, and even not to speak. I remembered when I took literacy training and taught an eager man to read. He was an adult, a family man with his own thriving business. He had hidden his deficit from everyone, including his family. I marveled at the way our minds support us with such determination as we choose. Now he wanted to learn, and he was going to surprise his family, especially his two little daughters who wanted to share their homework with him. As we met at our weekly sessions, I had to think about this gift of words and what it has meant to me too. Some days I was restless and tired after work, and keeping this commitment to him gave me promise of what gifts may come from our human interaction – beyond a paper shuffle and keeping order in a changing world. He would walk in, a little embarrassed at first, removing his baseball cap as he entered the room. When we read a page, he would look up and smile with a light that came from his eyes and a place as deep as he had lived. As we read together, side by side, I felt happy and more determined myself. When we finished our sessions and he was ready to continue on his own, his eyes shone like the little boy he once was. He carried his book under his arm like a treasure, and proclaimed that he was ready to read to his little girls! I cried when we hugged because I felt so happy. He gave me a gift of eternal happiness in that moment.

Our world shrinks and grows as our mind perceives and creates. When Fred lost his driver’s license, his world shrank to a small circumference, and his experience with his neighbors became even more important. My other friend remembered her father and his caring of others. She spoke of sick neighbors, some without the wide circumference of world experience and knowledge that he’d had in his life, and how he would care for them, be sure they had what they needed. I remember my father shaking his head over his changing life as he strained to move from bed to chair with absolute focus and intention. I remember his smile as he looked at us with that light in his eyes, and the way his mouth lifted on one side, the way he sometimes sang, spontaneously, just because he was happy. Our human connection is our most important energy resource, and we must cherish these gifts. Each gift lives as we do, uncovering them, daily, in memories! Thank you, friends for sharing the moments.

Sunday, July 05, 2009

Honor, Kings and Queens

"Memory is like a phoenix, continually arising out of its own destruction." Kathleen McGowan, Discover magazine article, "Out of the Past" July/August 2009

We can learn so much from every human being. A few weeks ago some friends and I were talking, pool-side, after a great day of learning about ourselves as energy and matter (and Neural Depolarization), about the form and function of our nerves and nervous systems as our life-givers & receivers. The evening was beautiful, with a light breeze, sky thick with clouds in some parts of our view and clearing with shades of blue in others before the moon began to brighten as the sky darkened. As I listened, relaxed and energized, I heard how we are opening our minds to love, and the love of our creation. As one friend talked about all she felt and became conscious of as she walked to the mailbox on a bright morning, I remembered a scenario from a recent trip to Virginia for a college graduation party. A group of high schoolers were sitting at the pier over the pond. As we talked with them, they got interested in getting into the kayak to paddle around the pond that was busy with fish. One dark-eyed, particularly engaging kid, maybe 16 years old, was very excited, full of energy. Later, in the house, when he came in, we asked how the kayaking was and he answered, it was awesome! I felt like I was king of the world!, with his arms raised high and a smile to light the room. Still pool-side, another friend explained how she felt the purity of energy with her 3-month old granddaughter, what a beautiful reminder babies are of pure love and its power in life.

I’ve been thinking of this, and of Michael Jackson, as I’ve watched the news about him, his life, his music, his death, his family. His legacy of caring is clear, his drive for perfection, the music in him, his magnetic energy of love, and of loss. One thing I’ve heard so many who knew him say is that he was always seeking to learn, to incorporate new knowledge, to expand what he could do. Let’s create a new instrument!, he said to one producer.

We can learn so much from every human being. There are no strangers. Trust love. To love, my intention must be honorable, ethical. It is the smallest of things, of fleeting thoughts that can become obsessive, take root, which reveal the lingering fears that have lived in my mind, and in collective minds, throughout time. The joy of this young boy on the pier, the strength and exuberance of his youthful energy, was a joy to behold and to feel. I was sad to see the cigarette dangling so casually from his mouth, from his loose fingers, but I understood the urge (I've lived it!) As energy, we grow into Knowing Thyself, as chemical energy beings. As I grow, as I change, as I experience the time and space of aging, of life energy moving and changing, I know why we look at life differently when we are consciously feeling love, despite the circumstances that we are living. “Our new level of sensory perception will continue to expand until it begins to affect our waking mind.” (174) Happiness is free, chosen by ready minds and hearts when we begin to feel the excitement of having physical feelings. In Spirit Consciousness, Kathy explains how we use our loving emotions to expand our feelings as we begin to gently caress our fears, bringing them into our conscious mind to heal. This is the pattern of the depolarization of our nervous system, which gives us life and through which we experience the reality of our own creation –we honor our creation as human life, and the purity of love as our creative energy, or we contaminate our chemical energy. We alter our memory simply by thinking with love. (See McGowan's article in Discover magazine!) Love heals!

I am enjoying the sensations of momentary life, of infinity in a grain of sand. The tethers of fearful thoughts like ropes and strings are the same as some doctors’ view of the nerves in the body as simply strings tying up a package. Thoughts are real as energy, and love honors the gift of life. I am grateful for the gift of knowledge as a growing conscious mind. Thank you, King of Pop, thank you, teenage king of the world, for your infinite gifts. You will live forever...